Fic: Gossamer (2/18)
Mar. 15th, 2012 02:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sara_wolfTitle: Gossamer
Rating: PG
Warnings: none
Summary: "Paige, you're pregnant." Three weeks after her parents' death, Paige receives some surprising news. What she decides next will change the course of history, not only her own, but that of the family she doesn't even know exists...
*****
The first Monday back at school was hard. She didn't know how the rumor mill had found out about her condition, but the news had spread like wildfire, and Paige could hear the whispers all around her as she walked down the halls. For a few seconds, after the first person had looked at her with an all-too-knowing gaze in their eyes, Paige had considered skipping school and hiding out somewhere.
But, she shook off the impulse, and forced herself to keep moving. She'd promised her aunt and uncle, and more importantly herself, that she wasn't going to fall back into her old, destructive habits after her parents' death, that drinking, skipping school, and acting out were all behind her. She was at a new school, and she had the chance to make a new start. Assuming everyone else was willing to let her.
'Besides,' she thought, wryly, her hands curling protectively around her still-flat abdomen, 'what kind of example would I set for my child?'
No, skipping school was out of the question. And so was calling her aunt to come get her, no matter how rough the day got. Julie and Dave had been skeptical enough about taking her in, especially with her history. Finding out that she was pregnant had just increased their disappointment in her.
She'd heard enough of the angrily-whispered arguments between her aunt and uncle ever since she'd dropped the bombshell of her pregnancy; she had no desire to go back to that any sooner than she had to, and that was assuming that her aunt was even willing to come and pick her up in the first place.
Instead, she squared her shoulders and went through her day with a dogged determination that she hadn't even known that she'd possessed. She kept her head down, spoke only when someone spoke to her, first, and silently counted down the minutes until she could finally get out of there.
Finally, the day was almost done. She marched through the hall to her last class, ignoring the whispers that followed her to the room, as she'd done all day. She made her way to her usual desk at the back of the room, but she stopped in her tracks when the girls clustered together at their desks stopped talking to stare at her like a specimen under a microscope.
Paige could feel a blush creeping up on her cheeks as she was pinned by their direct gazes, and she turned and fled back to the front of the room, dropping into the first empty desk she found. She buried her head in her hands as the loud whispers started up behind her, trying in vain to ignore the pointed mutterings.
The class passed by with agonizing slowness, and Paige fled as soon as the last bell rang. She headed for the parking lot before she remembered that her cousin, Jeff, who was supposed to drive her home, had band practice for another hour. Which meant that she was stuck at school until he was done.
She could have taken the bus home, but she really didn't feel like dealing with being stared at some more. And she really didn't want to walk back to her aunt and uncle's house. So, she was stuck.
She found a spot under a tree and sat back against the trunk. Pulling her history book out of her backpack, she started reading. But, her mind was only half on the subject, and she lost her concentration completely when she heard her name being said.
She looked up, expecting to see someone talking to her, but she just saw a group of girls walking toward their cars, talking animatedly. And, after hearing her name, Paige couldn't help but eavesdrop on their conversation.
"Yeah, I heard she was like this at her old school, too," one of the girls was saying, and Paige started to get a sinking feeling in her gut.
Another girl laughed, the sound high-pitched and cruel. "You mean, easy?" she sneered, and the rest of the group laughed along with her.
Paige could feel the heat flooding her cheeks as she went crimson with shame. She buried her face in her hands, trying to block out the sound of the girls' mocking laughter.
'I was stupid and naive to think that I could get away from this,' she thought, miserably. 'It doesn't matter that I'm at a brand-new school; I guess I'm still the same old Paige.'
"You shouldn't listen to them," a male voice said, breaking into her thoughts, and she lifted her head to see a familiar face watching her, sympathetically. "Most of those hypocrites are guilty of the exact same thing they're attacking you for."
"Yeah, but none of them got knocked up," Paige said, bitterly, as she glared half-heartedly at Henry. "Why do you care, anyway?"
"You looked unhappy," Henry said, with a shrug, as he sat down beside her. "I don't like it when you're unhappy."
"You don't even know me," Paige protested.
"I'd like to," Henry told her, and Paige snorted, derisively.
"Right," she muttered. "I'm sure it's your heart's desire to be best buds with the local delinquent who'll sleep with any guy who asks," she added, parroting the same things she'd heard whispered behind her back, all day.
Henry was silent for so long that she was pretty sure that she'd finally managed to offend him. But, when she risked a glance over at the boy, he was studying her with a solemn expression on his face.
"What?" she snapped, when he remained silent, just looking at her.
"Why are you so hard on yourself?" he asked, quietly. "You're only human; you made a mistake."
"The last time I made a mistake this big, my parents were killed in a car crash," Paige retorted, without thinking about it, and then she snapped her mouth shut.
She looked pointedly away from Henry, afraid to see censure, or worse, in his eyes. Then, as a warm hand covered her own, she looked up at him in shock.
"We've all done things we regret," he said, quietly, as she wondered if he was speaking from personal experience. "You shouldn't let this be one of them."
"I don't even know what I'm going to do," she admitted, softly, wondering why she was telling him all this. "I don't know the right thing to do."
"Whatever you decide," Henry told her, earnestly, "don't do it out of anger, or fear. Let yourself love this baby, if even for a little bit, and whatever choice you make will be the right one."
"You sound like you've made that speech, before," Paige said, wryly, and Henry just shrugged.
"Let's just say that I've spent a lot of time over the years wondering why my parents would have given me up," he told her. "I want to believe that they loved me, that they thought that giving me up was the best thing-"
He trailed off, a wistful look in his eyes as he stared off in the distance. Then, he snapped back to attention a few seconds later, looking ruefully at her.
"I'm sorry," he apologized. "I was trying to make you feel better, not make this all about me."
"I used to wonder why my birth parents gave me up, too," Paige told him, and he looked at her in surprise.
"You're a foster kid?" he asked, and Paige nodded.
"I was left at a church when I was a baby," she told him. "I was in foster care for a couple of years, and my parents adopted me through a friend at the church when I was three."
"You were lucky," Henry said, the wistful tone back in his voice.
"I was lucky," she agreed. "I could have spent my life bouncing from place to place, never having anywhere to call home. Instead, I got the gift of the most amazing parents in the world. I just wish that it hadn't taken me so long to realize it," she finished, sadly.
"I've been in foster care since I was two weeks old," Henry told her, quietly. "I had a place until I was five, people that I called Mom and Dad – up until they decided that they didn't want to be parents, anymore. There hasn't really been any place, since."
"I don't want that kind of future for my baby," Paige said. "I don't want my child to go through that kind of pain."
"So, what are you going to do?" Henry asked.
"I still don't know," Paige admitted, with a sigh.
Continued here
Rating: PG
Warnings: none
Summary: "Paige, you're pregnant." Three weeks after her parents' death, Paige receives some surprising news. What she decides next will change the course of history, not only her own, but that of the family she doesn't even know exists...
*****
The first Monday back at school was hard. She didn't know how the rumor mill had found out about her condition, but the news had spread like wildfire, and Paige could hear the whispers all around her as she walked down the halls. For a few seconds, after the first person had looked at her with an all-too-knowing gaze in their eyes, Paige had considered skipping school and hiding out somewhere.
But, she shook off the impulse, and forced herself to keep moving. She'd promised her aunt and uncle, and more importantly herself, that she wasn't going to fall back into her old, destructive habits after her parents' death, that drinking, skipping school, and acting out were all behind her. She was at a new school, and she had the chance to make a new start. Assuming everyone else was willing to let her.
'Besides,' she thought, wryly, her hands curling protectively around her still-flat abdomen, 'what kind of example would I set for my child?'
No, skipping school was out of the question. And so was calling her aunt to come get her, no matter how rough the day got. Julie and Dave had been skeptical enough about taking her in, especially with her history. Finding out that she was pregnant had just increased their disappointment in her.
She'd heard enough of the angrily-whispered arguments between her aunt and uncle ever since she'd dropped the bombshell of her pregnancy; she had no desire to go back to that any sooner than she had to, and that was assuming that her aunt was even willing to come and pick her up in the first place.
Instead, she squared her shoulders and went through her day with a dogged determination that she hadn't even known that she'd possessed. She kept her head down, spoke only when someone spoke to her, first, and silently counted down the minutes until she could finally get out of there.
Finally, the day was almost done. She marched through the hall to her last class, ignoring the whispers that followed her to the room, as she'd done all day. She made her way to her usual desk at the back of the room, but she stopped in her tracks when the girls clustered together at their desks stopped talking to stare at her like a specimen under a microscope.
Paige could feel a blush creeping up on her cheeks as she was pinned by their direct gazes, and she turned and fled back to the front of the room, dropping into the first empty desk she found. She buried her head in her hands as the loud whispers started up behind her, trying in vain to ignore the pointed mutterings.
The class passed by with agonizing slowness, and Paige fled as soon as the last bell rang. She headed for the parking lot before she remembered that her cousin, Jeff, who was supposed to drive her home, had band practice for another hour. Which meant that she was stuck at school until he was done.
She could have taken the bus home, but she really didn't feel like dealing with being stared at some more. And she really didn't want to walk back to her aunt and uncle's house. So, she was stuck.
She found a spot under a tree and sat back against the trunk. Pulling her history book out of her backpack, she started reading. But, her mind was only half on the subject, and she lost her concentration completely when she heard her name being said.
She looked up, expecting to see someone talking to her, but she just saw a group of girls walking toward their cars, talking animatedly. And, after hearing her name, Paige couldn't help but eavesdrop on their conversation.
"Yeah, I heard she was like this at her old school, too," one of the girls was saying, and Paige started to get a sinking feeling in her gut.
Another girl laughed, the sound high-pitched and cruel. "You mean, easy?" she sneered, and the rest of the group laughed along with her.
Paige could feel the heat flooding her cheeks as she went crimson with shame. She buried her face in her hands, trying to block out the sound of the girls' mocking laughter.
'I was stupid and naive to think that I could get away from this,' she thought, miserably. 'It doesn't matter that I'm at a brand-new school; I guess I'm still the same old Paige.'
"You shouldn't listen to them," a male voice said, breaking into her thoughts, and she lifted her head to see a familiar face watching her, sympathetically. "Most of those hypocrites are guilty of the exact same thing they're attacking you for."
"Yeah, but none of them got knocked up," Paige said, bitterly, as she glared half-heartedly at Henry. "Why do you care, anyway?"
"You looked unhappy," Henry said, with a shrug, as he sat down beside her. "I don't like it when you're unhappy."
"You don't even know me," Paige protested.
"I'd like to," Henry told her, and Paige snorted, derisively.
"Right," she muttered. "I'm sure it's your heart's desire to be best buds with the local delinquent who'll sleep with any guy who asks," she added, parroting the same things she'd heard whispered behind her back, all day.
Henry was silent for so long that she was pretty sure that she'd finally managed to offend him. But, when she risked a glance over at the boy, he was studying her with a solemn expression on his face.
"What?" she snapped, when he remained silent, just looking at her.
"Why are you so hard on yourself?" he asked, quietly. "You're only human; you made a mistake."
"The last time I made a mistake this big, my parents were killed in a car crash," Paige retorted, without thinking about it, and then she snapped her mouth shut.
She looked pointedly away from Henry, afraid to see censure, or worse, in his eyes. Then, as a warm hand covered her own, she looked up at him in shock.
"We've all done things we regret," he said, quietly, as she wondered if he was speaking from personal experience. "You shouldn't let this be one of them."
"I don't even know what I'm going to do," she admitted, softly, wondering why she was telling him all this. "I don't know the right thing to do."
"Whatever you decide," Henry told her, earnestly, "don't do it out of anger, or fear. Let yourself love this baby, if even for a little bit, and whatever choice you make will be the right one."
"You sound like you've made that speech, before," Paige said, wryly, and Henry just shrugged.
"Let's just say that I've spent a lot of time over the years wondering why my parents would have given me up," he told her. "I want to believe that they loved me, that they thought that giving me up was the best thing-"
He trailed off, a wistful look in his eyes as he stared off in the distance. Then, he snapped back to attention a few seconds later, looking ruefully at her.
"I'm sorry," he apologized. "I was trying to make you feel better, not make this all about me."
"I used to wonder why my birth parents gave me up, too," Paige told him, and he looked at her in surprise.
"You're a foster kid?" he asked, and Paige nodded.
"I was left at a church when I was a baby," she told him. "I was in foster care for a couple of years, and my parents adopted me through a friend at the church when I was three."
"You were lucky," Henry said, the wistful tone back in his voice.
"I was lucky," she agreed. "I could have spent my life bouncing from place to place, never having anywhere to call home. Instead, I got the gift of the most amazing parents in the world. I just wish that it hadn't taken me so long to realize it," she finished, sadly.
"I've been in foster care since I was two weeks old," Henry told her, quietly. "I had a place until I was five, people that I called Mom and Dad – up until they decided that they didn't want to be parents, anymore. There hasn't really been any place, since."
"I don't want that kind of future for my baby," Paige said. "I don't want my child to go through that kind of pain."
"So, what are you going to do?" Henry asked.
"I still don't know," Paige admitted, with a sigh.
Continued here
